| Flair | |
|---|---|
| |
| "Next time you come by, dear, have any drink you want...no charge." | |
Info
| |
| Other names: | Mistress Boss Queen Flair |
| Bioform: | Badge |
| Native zone: | The Cafe |
| Residence: | The Cafe |
| Occupation: | Manager |
| Likes: | Money, violence, dolphins |
| Dislikes: | Unprofessionalism |
The manager of The Cafe and a manipulative little badge!
Description[]
Flair takes the form of a yellow smiling badge worn by her employees, such as Chip or Joe. She can talk with the wearer, mostly for scolding them. These pins are actually only a small part of her and are worn by all those who work for her. Her true body, as first seen from Isaac's perspective, is branched and colored in a pinkish red. The branches have a feminine but limbless shape and each ends with a smiling badge face. Her mouth is right under the badge face. Employees that wear a badge are actually held like puppets by Flair's branches.
Flair is harsh with her employees, forbidding them from doing anything that isn't job relevant and keeping them overworked. she is how ever much nicer to Joe. As Bogleech himself put it, "she and Joe have a lot more in common." In any case, she's a lot more patient with Joe than she ever was with Chip and even calls Joe by pet names like "dear" and "sugar".
She is also a master of psychological manipulation, tricking customers to tip more. She accomplishes this by playing on their guilt and making them feel the need to contribute. In fact, she's so greedy after money that she goes as far as charging for not buying anything when visiting her Cafe. Comically, some of her products cost even less than ordering nothing. She doesn't even hide her greed in the eyes of her customers. If her employees ever feel the need to kill a customer she doesn't allow it unless the said customer no longer has money on them, following the rule of "work before fun". She too enjoys acts of violence and it comes as no surprise that she is a fan of dolphins.
There's a speculation that Flair actually brainwashed Joe, erasing his memories of his past life as Jay. As a bonus, the Slobs that turn from Joe still wear the Flair badges, thus they continue to work for her. With this endless source of new employees Flair started expanding the Cafe, as noticed by its larger size.
Being opportunistic, she tricks Slobs other than Joeslobs to unwillingly become part of her new staff by giving them a free "Parliament Special" that she claims to be "safe-brewed, safe-flavored bomkucha tea available exclusively for Parliament Bionodes". In actuality, this is just a red bottle with a badge-faced part of Flair in it.
According to Marcy, Flair, like the Recombinators, is neither necessarily benign nor malevolent, but she is a predator, existing to capitalize on a demand for a product.
First Appearance[]
In Awful Hospital.
Trivia[]
- Her name comes from the "flairs" that are decorations which people like baristas are obligated to wear as part of their uniform.
- At The Cafe there's a picture on the wall showing Flair with a yellow humanoid body but the neck doesn't connect with the head.
- Joe feels pleasure wearing Flair.
- Flair is polygamous.
Gallery[]
